why do people watch me?

My dad thinks my videos are cringe.

I attribute this to the fact that he is the typical Gen X Asian dad who is not in touch with his feelings.

However this does bring up a fair question:

Why do people watch my videos?

I think it’s fair to say that a majority of my videos are somber, introspective, and philosophical.

At least I’d like to think so.

My mom calls them whiney.

(I’d like to clarify that I’m not writing this to disparage against my parents. I love them to death, and I honestly think it’s good that they disagree with my openness on social media)

No matter what you would like to call my videos, it’s clear that (some) people like to watch.

My hypothesis is that it’s because people love seeing emotional vulnerability.

We love it because it we can understand it, we can empathize with it. Unlike the billions of videos on social media, it feels real.

Now, this is basically me admitting that I use my emotional struggle for digital clout. I’d be lying if I said that statement wasn’t partially true.

But I do think sharing my struggles has a positive impact apart from providing me emotional validation. There are many people who have reached out in my comments or DMs to say that they are going through exactly what I’m feeling as well. I think my videos provide value in the fact that I am able to articulate particular emotional experiences that my particular demographic experience.

Thats because once a specific emotion is put into words, it becomes tangible. Tangible problems are much easier to solve then intangible ones. There’s a reason why journaling works so well to organize and process your thoughts. Thoughts are fleeting, ephemeral things that return every once in a while to torment you then disappear as fast as they came. Writing them down chains them to permanence, so you can understand how and why you are thinking these things.

So, I think that people watch me because I am able to articulate my emotional experiences, which they often relate to. I of course want to get better at doing this. I want to become more succinct, more thoughtful. I don’t just want to be able to articulate my emotional troubles, I want to also be able to solve them, so that others can do the same. This will come with more reading, thinking, journaling, and time.

That’s it from me today.